Sometimes you can see....
the tapestry of your life unfold before your eyes. You can see why this thread of happiness and joy was placed here and those threads of heartache and despair were placed there and how they all fit together to make who you are. That you've had those experiences not only for your own personal growth, but for the growth and welfare of those around you. And even more interesting than that, when you sit and talk to someone else and see how their own tapestry fits so perfectly with yours.
I can't seem to stop the tears tonight. Have you ever felt so completely overcome with Heavenly Father's love? When you've seen a miracle happen in your life and you just KNOW...like you know the sky is blue...that God loves you and is answering one of your prayers in a more perfect way than you could've even imagined up for yourself. Truly He has heard the pleadings of my heart, the desires of my soul, and has poured His blessings out on this Brimhall Family.
After dinner with a beautiful and gracious couple tonight, Brett left to spend some time with the kids and tuck them in bed while I went to fill up the car with gas and get some groceries. As I stood at the gas pump, the tears began to flow. I'm sure a few people must've wondered why in the world a lady was filling up her car at the gas station and crying like a baby. And as I walked around Fry's, turning the apples in my hand, looking for the freshest strawberries, the tears would well up and spill all over again.
No, all of life's problems were not solved in one evening. But tonight I had a glimpse into the way so many people admire my dear husband and the talents that he has been blessed with and I got to see just how much he means to others. Tonight I was reminded just how much my Heavenly Father is aware of me. Tonight I felt His love in the deepest part of my soul. And that is a good place to be....
Tonight Daddy told me how you shared with him that sometimes you cry yourself to sleep at night. That you miss Grandma so much that you just cry and cry and cry until your small body is all worn out. I'm sorry that I didn't know that! How could I NOT know that? When I got home from the store, you were already asleep. But I went downstairs, anyways. I rubbed your cheek and ran my hand across your freshly buzzed summer hair. And since my tears were already falling, I layed down on your twin-sized bed with you and cried a little more. You are my quiet one. My one who holds it all inside. My one who doesn't demand attention with loud words or big actions or announce accomplishments. You quietly go about life, loving those around you. I rested my arm across your body and whispered to you just how much I love you. You began to stir, rolled towards me, opened your eyes, told me that you loved me back, kissed me, and went back to sleep. I GET you...I GET who you are...because you are ME in so, so many ways! When you miss Grandma, let's cry together. Because I miss her, too!